Category Archives: random thoughts

Where Izzybella Catches Ya’ll Up

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Yeah, it’s been a while.  I had stuff to do, see, work stuff and other stuff.  This excuse is lame, is it not?  But it’s true.  Truthy.

So, let me break it down into two parts because I feel like doing that way.

Work: This is my busy season (this and December/January).  For some reason the fall start date kicks my butt.  I think it might be that we tend to accept so many more students in the fall, but we also had some new start-up sites, which I realize means nothing to you, but let me assure you it’s a lot of work.  I also travel with the lead teachers and a few administrators to our distance sites to do new student orientation, which I love, mostly because it’s fantastic to meet the students who have been emailing me for so many months.  Right when they first start the program, they’re so excited and happy to be here.  You have to cherish that because in less than a year, they’ll be bitter, unhappy, exhausted seniors who will hate every single one of us up until the day they graduate from the program.  They usually lighten up again by then!  The prospect of no more classes will do that to a student.  My SR2 students started courses today, but the rest of them start next Monday.  Lots to do between now and then.

Friends/Family/Everything else: My friend R got married this last weekend.  This is fabulous because weddings are always terrific, but mostly because she’s marrying a really nice guy.  I think he might actually be the last nice guy, which means I’m dead out of luck, but I couldn’t wish her more joy than I already do.  We did the bachelorette party two weekends ago.  I won nothing from the various contests.  I think I might have had a chance with some nekkid man artwork, had Chauceriangirl not played her hand at the last minute.  Her nekkid man art revealed nothing, yet everything.  It was genius.  She deserved the win, trust me.  Also, I had no idea my sister could be that filthy.

Wedding was last Friday, followed by reception on Sunday.  Here’s a good reception story for you and by good I mean embarrassing for me, personally, hence my goofy-ass need to immediately post it on the internet.  I wore heels to R’s reception.  Back about 100 lbs ago, this wouldn’t be particularly noteworthy, but I stopped wearing heels years ago because of heel spurs and ouchie feet.  As a result I am out of practice and no longer walk very well in heels.  But I promised R I would so I did.  Enter the Electric Slide.  Enter me trying to dance the Electric Slide.  It was badness and I decided to beat a hasty retreat, at which point I fell hard on my ass.  It was awesome.  Also it was caught on video by a co-worker who is now emailing me to tell me she accepts payment in twizzlers and oreos.  She keeps threatening to You Tube it, but I have decided to hold a hard stance on negotiating with You Tube terrorists.  After all, there are already a million You Tube videos depicting fat women falling on their asses as they attempt to dance.  I don’t think mine would add anything special to the genre.  But if she does post it, I’ll be sure and link you.  I’m a masochist that way.

My parents watched the RNC last weekend.  My parents are hard-core, ya’ll.  My stepmother loves, loves, loves Paul Ryan.  She doesn’t love Mitt Romney exactly but since she thinks Obama is the anti-Christ, he already has her vote.  I also witnessed the Clint Eastwood debacle since, you know, every single television in the house was turned on to the RNC.  I still love you, Clint Eastwood, even if you’d have been better off keeping your opinions to yourself.  This is my new philosophy this election season, starting now.  Unless you are one of the select few individuals who will love me no matter who I vote for, I have political views and I’m officially keeping them to myself.  Feel free to discuss with me, but don’t expect an agreement, disagreement or any other response.  The only caveat:  I am all for differing opinions but stop with all the hatin’.  You can think Obama’s policies are detrimental to the national economy without attacking him as a person, husband or father.  You can think Mitt Romney’s policies are antiquated and out-of-touch without throwing down about him being a filthy rich douche-canoe.  I’m willing to listen to anyone’s point-of-view if they have the intelligence and maturity to express it thoughtfully and in an educated manner.  This means that, yes, when my stepmother called Obama “lazy” over the weekend, we might have possibly had a small screaming match.  A teensy one.  Seriously?  Stop the hate, ya’ll!!  It just makes you look stupid.  Also?  People who hate have bad skin and smelly feet.  It’s a proven fact.

Finally, I saw Bourne Legacy this weekend.  Jeremy Renner?  Is awesome and wears the hell out of a suit.  That is all.

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The Scientific Method

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Just read my sister’s post about one highly scientific experiment she conducted in her youth and it reminded me of many of the highly scientific experiments I conducted as well, with and without her help.

For example, despite the illustrations in the Beverly Cleary books, a tube of toothpaste, when emptied, will NOT fill up the sink entirely.  It won’t even go a full city block.  It will however bleach said pavement so well that the bleached line will still be visible three years later.

Ants will bite your tongue if you put them in your mouth.

Putting water on your hand then placing your hand on a hot stove doesn’t cool the stove down.

Yuck Nail does not work on a truly dedicated nail biter.

Cats do usually land on their feet even if slung upside down.  This was a highly dangerous experience by the way which earned me multiple scratches and a good spanking from my mother.

When the server says “be careful, the plate is hot,” they are not kidding.  Don’t touch it.

It is possible to kill a cactus from not watering enough.

How about you, dear reader?  Any scientific facts you learned the hard way?

Randomness 9/13/2011 Edition

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I have a lot of stuff to do at work right now.  Like seriously, I’m overwhelmed.  The moment I complete one task I get two more and while I’m grateful just to have a job in this economy, I’m exhausted.  And clearly on the whiny side of life.  Naturally, instead of tackling my miles long to-do list, I must immediately do a blupdate because (1) it’s been forever and I think I may have lost my two followers and (2) it gives me the illusion of having any type of life outside of work. 

You know how some people are leaders and some are followers?  And supposedly being a leader is best because it looks good on your resume and it means you are a go-get-em kind of person, which is the kind of person many people admire.  Me?  I think I am a follower and I’m finally okay with that.  I can have good ideas here and there but I’m not a blazer of new trails.  Part of me is disappointed in this severe lack of get up and go, but the other part of me is just fine with that.  If everyone was a leader going forth and blazing new trails then the entire world would be one huge mass of intersecting trails going nowhere and doing nothing.  A leader may blaze the trail, but the followers are the ones who stomp the trail into submission.  We have value, too-it’s just a matter of having the intelligence to figure out which leader to follow.  Don’t knock the followers.  Unless they’re brainless zombie like drones, in which case, have at it.

I’m eating half of a left-over mushroom swiss burger for lunch.  It’s not very WW friendly, which was why I only ate half of it to begin with last Saturday.  I’m so stressed out this week and it’s triggered my gnoshing buttons.  I envy people who lose weight when they are stressed because I am the opposite of that.  And I’m doing well on my weight loss goals except for not this week.  This week I am dreading the scale and trying to figure out exactly how much a person can gain from one king sized Mr. Goodbar. 

I visited the awesome-accept-no-substitutes Chauceriangirl over the weekend.  We didn’t really do much-just walked around and talked, had dinner.  When it was time for me to leave, I said something along the lines of “I must leave now” and Emmy Lou Who, the dog, replied “BARK, NO, BARK BARK!!”  And it made me laugh.  It’s possible you had to be there.  But I thought it was terribly cute.

Texas did it.  It beat the hellaciously hot record set in 1980 for the most 100 degree days in one season.  It happened today in fact.  Just this afternoon.  Texans like to brag about stuff like this, but I’d be glad to have left 1980 as the record holder.  This last summer was just wrong and evil.  It’s pathetic when 90 degrees seems cool and breezy in comparison.  I’m just saying.

I’m “reading” (book on CD during the work commute) a series by Kim Harrison called “The Hollows.”  The first two books were narrated by this fabulous actor who I absolutely loved listening to, but the the one I’m on now is a new actor and her performance suffers in comparison.  She sounds more like an accountant than a bad-ass witch demon-summoner with a heart of gold.  I want the first actor back.  Love the story, though, especially the character of Jenks.  He’s a pixie and he swears the most fabulous curses.  “Tink’s titties!”  “Tink’s a Disney whore!” “Oh, for the sweet humpin’ love of Tink!” “Tink’s panties!” And my personal favorite: “Tagged by a whiny little vamp,” he said gesturing. “Rache, take this sword and stick it in me. Just go and stick it in me. I’m a back-drafted, crumpled-winged, dust-caked, dew-assed excuse of a backup. Worthless as a pixy condom. Taken down by my own partner. Just tape my ass shut and let me fart out my mouth.”   He’s so vile.  And awesome.

Okay, I’m shutting down the randomness now.  Sadly, my 30 minutes of screwing off must come to end.  The 1/2 burger was eaten and randomness spewed forth.  Hope you enjoyed.

Random Thoughts 2/12/2011 Edition

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It’s been awhile since I did an honest-to-goodness blupdate, so I thought I’d check in with my random thoughts.

  • Chauceriangirl wins stuff.  Like ALL the time.  Probably the best thing she’s ever won was a MAC back when they were still huge desktops that you could order in colors like blueberry and tangerine.  But otherwise she’s won lots of little stuff here and there that most definitely adds up.  Me?  I don’t win stuff.  Chauceriangirl got all the winner genes in our family, so generally when I enter a contest or drawing of some type of other, I absolutely do not expect to win.  So imagine my surprise when I checked in on one of my favorite writer’s websites only to discover that I won something.  Actually, some things.  Nice things, like books, books on CD, and a gift certificate to enable my special new B&N Nook habit.  She actually did the drawing on 2/2, but I’ve been so bogged down with the work situation that I didn’t do much in the way of web-surfing in the last week.  But it was really nice to win, especially something from an author (Hi, Nicole Peeler) whose work I genuinely have enjoyed.  It was especially nifty after the week I have had, not the least of which included a car wreck.  I am fine.  The other guy, who’s fault it was, is fine.  He also was not insured so I’m taking a hit.  On the plus side, my tax refund is almost exactly the amount of my insurance deductible, so it could be worse.  I was disappointed, though, that I didn’t get to chuck the refund into my savings account.  The news of my weiner-hood came right at the end of the week and cheered me right up!!
  • The girl who loves Chaucer hung out with me some today in the midst of all my errand running.  It is always good to hang with her.  We walked around a huge-ass mall, which is literally one mile in circumference and it was just reaffirmation that I need to exercise more.  Chauceriangirl has lost 40 lbs now and it’s definitely showing.  The girly-girl in me kept pointing out adorable clothes which she would look adorable in. 
  • Speaking of adorable clothes, you must immediately click on this link for Clockwork Couture.  Go ahead.  Do it now.  I’ll wait.  You back?  Completely awesome, amirite?????????????  Most especially the boots.  If you didn’t look at them, go back and click on footwear.  Go ahead.  Do it now.  I’ll wait.  So.  Sweet.
  • Recently I ranted about how the Dallas Cowboy stadium was in ARLINGTON, dammit.  Well, now that everyone is criticizing the spectacularly dumbass move by the NFL (approximately 1000 seats sold at around $800/ticket were not available on game day, leaving the purchasers of said temporary nosebleed seating clean out of luck) and bitching about the rare subfreezing temperatures experienced during superbowl week and North Texans’ complete inability to navigate in bad weather or even, say, snowplow and sand the roads, I TAKE IT ALL BACK.  The Dallas Cowboys stadium is totally in Dallas.  Arlington has nothing to do with it, and neither does Fort Worth.  And cut us some slack, because as jehara once said, it’s usually warm here, and we only have the one snow plow.

Okay, here endeth the randomness.  There was gonna be more, but I have laundry to contend with.  And a Nook to read.  Did I mention I love my Nook?  Because I do.  I really, really do.  Peace out.

Brrr…It’s COLD In Here…

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…I was reading Chauceriangirl’s blupdate yesterday, which was titled “Brrr,” and my mind automatically went to Bring It On, starring Kirsten Dunst.  In the movie, Dunst finds out her former cheer captain stole cheer routines from the Clovers, one of which was “Brrr…It’s Cold In Here!  Must be some Clovers in the ATMOSPHERE!!!!!”  This is apropos of nothing except that since yesterday that cheer routine is stuck in my head like a bad ear-worm.  I know the movie is kind of silly, but I like it anyway.  For one, Kirsten Dunst is so freaking cute in that movie, all irresistable joy, not to mention her ethical code with respect to the art of cheerleading.  Plus Eliza Dushku is badass no matter what movie she’s in.  Except for True Lies.  She was truly unlikable in that one, but that has more to do with the stupid character she played than a lack of that utterly fab cool-girl moxy she displays in every other role.  The boy doesn’t do much for me there (sorry, cute boy who plays Eliza’s brother) but then again a movie about cheerleading ethics?  Not exactly the kind of movie Clive Owen-or other dreamy matinee idols I find dreamy-enjoy being in. 

Okay, I’ve talked about Bring It On, so maybe now the earworm will just go away.  In other news, it’s cold in Texas.  Like really, really cold.  Shut up Green Bay and Steelers fans.  Texans aren’t used to driving in ice and snow and it freaks us out, as does cold weather.  And while we’re talking about football, THE SUPERBOWL IS BEING HELD IN ARLINGTON, TX, NOT DALLAS, TX.  Sorry, had to get that out of the way.  Some media dude will be standing in front of cowboy stadium telling everyone how’s he’s in Dallas.  Well, dude, no you actually are in Arlington.  Just FYI.  Also, Fort Worth?  Not the same thing as Dallas.  In fact, they’re two separate cities. 

Wow, I didn’t know that was bugging me so bad.

Any-to-the-hoo, owing to the ice and snow, North Texas has pretty much shut down.  Snow day, ya’ll!!  Except for how I’ve worked all the way through it.  I proctored online exams for students all day yesterday and have spent a vast majority of my time during these “free days” doing job-related tasks.  Luckily, today’s online exams have been postponed, so maybe a little laziness is in order.

So basically this blupdate is about…nothing.  And I don’t even like Jerry Seinfeld. 

That was a 90s joke.  I’m so old…

A Real Actual Blupdate or Randomness 11/17/2010 Edition

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Okay, so Glee has taken over my blog.  Not my life, just my blog, which you’d never know from how many Glee reviews there are v. how many life-for-izzybella blupdates there are not.  I thought I’d give the bullet version of the last month.  I had a longer description in me, but it went out in letter form to jehara and I’m all typed out.   (That’s not a tease, jehara, the envelope is sealed and stamped – Homer Simpson, thank you very much – and all that remains is for me to drop it off at the post office, which I will do right after work.)  So:

  • Went on a cruise to Cozumel.  My cruise ship did not have a fire in the engine room, which is such a relief!  Seriously that other Carnival cruise drama happened the week after I got back and about 20 different people gave me some variation of “wow, that could have been you!!”  The cruise was a lot of fun.  I spent the majority of the time reading, sleeping, eating, reading, sleeping, reading, eating, drinking alcoholic drinks out of a coconut, reading, eating, eating dessert after the eating, reading and sleeping.  Also I laid out in a deck chair and got an actual tan.  It was very taxing as you can see.  Cozumel is beautiful.  It’s astounding how blue and clear non-oil-slicked ocean water is.  Cozumel was a definite high point as was the reading, sleeping, and eating.  Plus Victor Krum, one of our dining room waiters from Bulgaria.  His name isn’t really Victor Krum.  You’re astonished, right?
  • Work.  I don’t know what to add to that.  I’ve gotten used to the cycles here-we’re about to hit a busy season and I’m currently in the calm before the storm.  They’re sending out acceptance letters right now and once those go out, my workload increases drastically.  So I’m enjoying the breathing room while I have it.
  • The Texas Rangers did not win the World Series.  Okay, that didn’t happen to me personally, but I’ve been mightily interested.  I did not expect them to actually win; in fact, I didn’t really expect them to even make it as far as they did.  Just winning our division was so entirely awesome-getting to play the World Series was like tasty buttercream icing on top of the cake.  I think what made it so awesome was that it happened the same season that Nolan Ryan and partners purchased the team.  There’s something just RIGHT about Nolan Ryan owning the Rangers.  It makes me happy.  I was at the stadium (the old one) the night Nolan Right pitched his sixth no-hitter.  That was pretty awesome.  I mean not as awesome as it would have to have been there this night:
  •   Image from http://mlbfansite.com (You could buy an autographed copy there if you want…)
  •  L2 is lucky she made it off the ship alive.  She made a comment in passing about how the Rangers were going to lose and almost got her head ripped off by card carrying tee-shirt wearing Ranger’s fan.  I may slightly exaggerate, but not much.  I diffused though and L2 still lives.  🙂
  • I will be watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I tomorrow night.  Midnight.  Okay, lets face it.  I’m not a night person.  If it weren’t Harry Potter there is no way on the Lord’s lovely green earth that I would be staying up late to watch a movie.  With teenagers.  Lots of them.  Oh, crap, is too late to change my mind???  No?  Okay, then.  I have Friday off, which I will be using to sleep.  I have my priorities.

So that’s my bullet blupdate for now.  Hope your month has been just as good or better!

D’oh!

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I’ve been saying it all day.

11:05 AM.  I realize I forgot my lunch.  D’oh!  Oh well, dad can have my lunch.  Besides, I could stand to skip a meal.  I mean, have you seen me?  Trust me, it wouldn’t hurt.

12:15 PM.  The person who shares my office just heated up her lunch.  Spaghetti with clam sauce.  Okay, it smells really good, but just because it smells good doesn’t mean I have to eat.  I can wait till I get home.

12:40 PM.  Hell with that, I’m getting something to eat.  Besides it will be nice to sit by myself away from the office in a cool, cool restaurant with a tasty lunch and a good book.

1:00 PM.  Arrive at restaurant.  Realize the paperback book that was in my purse yesterday afternoon is currently sitting on my dresser at home where I left it after reading a chapter.  I have no problem eating out by myself, but I have to have a book.  No book=no eating out alone.

1:15 PM. Drive by Sonic for a corny dog.

1:30 PM. Decide to blow time by browsing the shelves at Walgreens.  I can’t speak for everyone else, but I personally enjoy walking around the drugstore sometimes.  I find no-slip hairbands on sale for buy one, get one free, so I buy two packs, plus a nifty looking headband.  Okay, and a Mr. Goodbar, I cannot lie.  Chocolate and peanuts.  sigh.

1:45 PM. On my way back to office, but realize (1) how long it’s been since I’ve stopped by Lone Star Comics, and (2) how ridiculously close the nearest Lone Star Comics is.  I haven’t been in almost two months, but they still have my subscriptions.  So I buy them, plus the next three volumes of Strangers in Paradise by Terry Moore.  (so close to having the entire set…)  I also find out from the adorable and helpful child working there (no really, she sounded really adult and professional, but looked about 12) that there is a True Blood comic out now, so she adds it to my subscriptions because as we all know, I’m saving money and can’t afford to purchase yet more comics and graphic novels. 

2:00 PM.  Late to work.  Still at Lone Star.

2:15 PM. Finally drag my butt back to the office.  Work steadily until it’s time to proctor an exam at 4:00.

3:55 PM.  No one has showed up for the exam yet.  That’s weird.  They’re usually here by now.  Double check my calendar-yep, I have it scheduled for today.  Double-check the professor.  Nope, not till next Thursday.  I do not at all feel stupid.  There’s no reason.  Besides, I’m not stupid, I’m just early.

D’oh.  Just saying.