Category Archives: Musings

Where Izzybella Catches Ya’ll Up

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Yeah, it’s been a while.  I had stuff to do, see, work stuff and other stuff.  This excuse is lame, is it not?  But it’s true.  Truthy.

So, let me break it down into two parts because I feel like doing that way.

Work: This is my busy season (this and December/January).  For some reason the fall start date kicks my butt.  I think it might be that we tend to accept so many more students in the fall, but we also had some new start-up sites, which I realize means nothing to you, but let me assure you it’s a lot of work.  I also travel with the lead teachers and a few administrators to our distance sites to do new student orientation, which I love, mostly because it’s fantastic to meet the students who have been emailing me for so many months.  Right when they first start the program, they’re so excited and happy to be here.  You have to cherish that because in less than a year, they’ll be bitter, unhappy, exhausted seniors who will hate every single one of us up until the day they graduate from the program.  They usually lighten up again by then!  The prospect of no more classes will do that to a student.  My SR2 students started courses today, but the rest of them start next Monday.  Lots to do between now and then.

Friends/Family/Everything else: My friend R got married this last weekend.  This is fabulous because weddings are always terrific, but mostly because she’s marrying a really nice guy.  I think he might actually be the last nice guy, which means I’m dead out of luck, but I couldn’t wish her more joy than I already do.  We did the bachelorette party two weekends ago.  I won nothing from the various contests.  I think I might have had a chance with some nekkid man artwork, had Chauceriangirl not played her hand at the last minute.  Her nekkid man art revealed nothing, yet everything.  It was genius.  She deserved the win, trust me.  Also, I had no idea my sister could be that filthy.

Wedding was last Friday, followed by reception on Sunday.  Here’s a good reception story for you and by good I mean embarrassing for me, personally, hence my goofy-ass need to immediately post it on the internet.  I wore heels to R’s reception.  Back about 100 lbs ago, this wouldn’t be particularly noteworthy, but I stopped wearing heels years ago because of heel spurs and ouchie feet.  As a result I am out of practice and no longer walk very well in heels.  But I promised R I would so I did.  Enter the Electric Slide.  Enter me trying to dance the Electric Slide.  It was badness and I decided to beat a hasty retreat, at which point I fell hard on my ass.  It was awesome.  Also it was caught on video by a co-worker who is now emailing me to tell me she accepts payment in twizzlers and oreos.  She keeps threatening to You Tube it, but I have decided to hold a hard stance on negotiating with You Tube terrorists.  After all, there are already a million You Tube videos depicting fat women falling on their asses as they attempt to dance.  I don’t think mine would add anything special to the genre.  But if she does post it, I’ll be sure and link you.  I’m a masochist that way.

My parents watched the RNC last weekend.  My parents are hard-core, ya’ll.  My stepmother loves, loves, loves Paul Ryan.  She doesn’t love Mitt Romney exactly but since she thinks Obama is the anti-Christ, he already has her vote.  I also witnessed the Clint Eastwood debacle since, you know, every single television in the house was turned on to the RNC.  I still love you, Clint Eastwood, even if you’d have been better off keeping your opinions to yourself.  This is my new philosophy this election season, starting now.  Unless you are one of the select few individuals who will love me no matter who I vote for, I have political views and I’m officially keeping them to myself.  Feel free to discuss with me, but don’t expect an agreement, disagreement or any other response.  The only caveat:  I am all for differing opinions but stop with all the hatin’.  You can think Obama’s policies are detrimental to the national economy without attacking him as a person, husband or father.  You can think Mitt Romney’s policies are antiquated and out-of-touch without throwing down about him being a filthy rich douche-canoe.  I’m willing to listen to anyone’s point-of-view if they have the intelligence and maturity to express it thoughtfully and in an educated manner.  This means that, yes, when my stepmother called Obama “lazy” over the weekend, we might have possibly had a small screaming match.  A teensy one.  Seriously?  Stop the hate, ya’ll!!  It just makes you look stupid.  Also?  People who hate have bad skin and smelly feet.  It’s a proven fact.

Finally, I saw Bourne Legacy this weekend.  Jeremy Renner?  Is awesome and wears the hell out of a suit.  That is all.

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Bright, Bright Sunshiney Day…

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Don’t laugh.  I totally have that song earworming it’s way through my head right now, but it fits.  It feels like my view on everything has shifted, righting itself for the first time in years.

Those of you who follow my blog are already aware that I lost my little sister to violence some years back.  It rocked my world.  I couldn’t make myself do anything beyond just getting out of bed and it was a chore doing even that most days.  After about three weeks of this, I visited my doctor and obtained a prescription for anti-depressants.  I won’t lie; they helped immensely.  They numbed me enough to enable me to function.  Gradually, I started living again, but as a calmer, quieter, different version of myself.  But the anti-depressants had numerous side-effects: sleeplessness, weight-gain, blood pressure spikes, etc., so my doctor prescribed other pills to offset those side-effects.  Each new pill had yet another side-effect and my doctor continued to prescribe in an effort to keep me stable.  By last March, I was taking almost as many medications as my diabetic 69-year-old father. At my last visit, my doctor wanted to prescribe yet another medication.  I couldn’t bring myself to fill it.  I was done.  And so I weaned off gradually.  Today I am on my 11th day free of meds and for the first day in a long time, I feel like me.  Here are few things about myself I totally forgot.

I am a crier.  Okay, I was never exactly proud of this trait.  Who wants to be known as the girl who cries over Hallmark commercials?  Or, as I told Faith this morning, that one VISA commercial where the woman flies all the way from Australia to be with her pregnant sister as she delivers her first child?  I believe my reaction consisted of copious tears and me proclaming that, “I would totally fly from Australia to be with Faith like that!!!!”  It’s actually a relief to cry over sad scenes in movies or in books; or because a friend gives you an unbelievably considerate and generous gift; or because the sky is a perfect shade of blue and the wind is blowing your hair all around and the knockout roses in the backyard smell divine and this moment in this particular day couldn’t be any more beautiful or wonderful.  It’s a relief.

I am passionate about my opinions and beliefs.  This has recently led to trouble as medicated me was more likely to avoid discussions about touchy subjects such as politics and religion.  Non-medicated me strongly wants to defend my beliefs, agrees with whomever said that the status is not quo, and has utterly no problem stating her positions on life and calling a spade a spade.  Or as in the most recent case, a fucking idiot, a fucking idiot.  I’m looking at you, Rush Limbaugh.  I was forced to apologize for the four letter expletive, but I stand my ground on the sentiment.  Just saying.

I like being physically active.  No, I really do.  Stairs work just as well as elevators.  Navigating the hilly tree-lined streets around my house makes me exhausted, but the good kind of exhausted.  The blisters on my heels hurt, but they’re fantastic because they mean I’m alive.  My heart and lungs ache from my body’s inactivity, but they’re working, pumping oxygen through me, allowing me to breathe deeply and to continue moving.  I am literally excited to go home tonight, change clothes and head outside for a while.

Theatre ROCKS!  All this pent-up energy and passion that has had nowhere to go for ages is completely psyched about the arts again.  I want to see shows, work on my play again; dude, I wanna go to the museum.  I want to see plays that make me uncomfortable-I want my world views to be proven wrong as much as I want to be proven right.  I want to engage again.  It’s been too long.

I still love pretty men.  I’m not saying I was brain-dead all those years-I mean I still got pleasure out of looking at a fantastically gorgeous guy.  It’s just the meds sort of numb all the responses down so I really only looked once, appreciated and moved on.  I’m just saying you get so much more out of it when you look two or three times before moving on.  🙂  I think I might even be willing to date again.  At least after a little more of remembering who I am first…

…because, I am a little bit of a mess trying to figure all this out.  But still, I feel like myself again.  I like who I am without the meds weighing me down.  I’m probably more exasperating to my friends and family, and I admit this is all taking some getting used to.  But I’m back.  Heh.  I’d apologize for unleashing myself on the world, but I’m not actually all that sorry.

How May I Direct Your Call?

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So apparently unrelenting boredom is an excellent motivator for blupdating one’s personal blog.  I had no idea.  I am working the front desk at my college of nursing today, which means other than answering phones, there isn’t much to do.  Add to that the little fact that it’s Spring Break this week and how the phone is most decidedly not ringing off the hook and you have a recipe for complete and utter soul-sucking boredom.  Seriously.  I tried to get my sister to entertain me, but she’s all “I have a job, I don’t have time to entertain you…”  Rude.  Okay, she wasn’t rude about it all.  I just need entertainment.  Clearly it’s up to me to relieve my ennui.

So what shall we talk about, gentle reader?

….

Wow, okay, so Spring Break was like three weeks ago and I never finished this post.  Know what happened?  I couldn’t think of anything to talk about.  That’s just sad.  It’s not like nothing has been going on.  There’s been somethings.  For example, I took a couple of days off during Spring Break and devoted them to complete self-absorption.  The parentals were on vacation so it was just me and the dogs.  Thursday and Friday were spent with friends doing fun friendy things like movies and rock barrels and IKEA, etc.  Had dinner Friday night at the Fort Worth Food Truck Park (Lee’s Grilled Cheeses-a food truck devoted to grilled cheese sandwiches.  What is not to love there??)  Saturday I slept in, read the newspaper, watched Bones and Vampire Diaries DVDs and went to bed early.  Sunday I slept in, read the newspaper and drank Dad’s superior “Daddy Coffee”, finished reading Kim Harrison’s newest, watched some more Bones DVDs and then went to bed early.

Then weekend before last, I went to that cosmopolitan metropolis known as Beaumont with mah bestie.  She received an academic award because she’s a smartie-pants.  We would have stayed in that sophisticated city, but we decided Galveston was more to our liking so we spent the rest of the weekend there.  We…walked on the beach (sweet!), collected sea shells, ate at Gaido’s sister restaurant, Casey’s (less than fresh, should’ve sucked it up and gone to Gaido’s), walked along the Strand, stared longingly at the Port of Galveston where the Triumph was sitting in dock waiting to cruise to Cozumel, got massively sunburned (just me), stayed in a crap hotel (but who cares where you sleep??), had breakfast at Waffle House (fan-freaking-tastic) and headed back to Fort Worth.  Plus, we stopped at Buc-cee’s twice, on the way there (tasty hot chocolate!) and on the way back (solarcaine!!).  I may have to do a separate post on the marvels of Buc-cees.  It’s like a little gas station theme park right in the middle of 1-10.  It’s a thing of beauty.  Would you like a couple of pics of the road trip?  TOO BAD!  You’re getting a couple anyway.  🙂

In East Texas on the road to Beaumont, pretty amirite?

This badass bridge between Beaumont and Port Arthur (I thought it was cool anyway…)

Galveston beach…got there early in the a.m. to watch the sun come up, but it was already kind of crowded.

So, see??  Stuff.

I think this qualifies as a blupdate.  Go, me!  Now go forth and enjoy your day. . .

The Scientific Method

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Just read my sister’s post about one highly scientific experiment she conducted in her youth and it reminded me of many of the highly scientific experiments I conducted as well, with and without her help.

For example, despite the illustrations in the Beverly Cleary books, a tube of toothpaste, when emptied, will NOT fill up the sink entirely.  It won’t even go a full city block.  It will however bleach said pavement so well that the bleached line will still be visible three years later.

Ants will bite your tongue if you put them in your mouth.

Putting water on your hand then placing your hand on a hot stove doesn’t cool the stove down.

Yuck Nail does not work on a truly dedicated nail biter.

Cats do usually land on their feet even if slung upside down.  This was a highly dangerous experience by the way which earned me multiple scratches and a good spanking from my mother.

When the server says “be careful, the plate is hot,” they are not kidding.  Don’t touch it.

It is possible to kill a cactus from not watering enough.

How about you, dear reader?  Any scientific facts you learned the hard way?

Jonah Day

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Though I’ve been known to do so in the past, I try not to use my blog as an extra-venti venting vehicle.  But today is just a Jonah Day.  If you’ve read Anne of Green Gables, you know what a Jonah Day is.  If you haven’t, just refer to the biblical story about the guy who got swallowed by the whale and you’ll have the general idea.  I won’t get into specifics because it will make me sound like a big honking whiner (dude, I totally am) and it will just make me more depressed (also true).  A really smart person once told me when I get like this to start listing positive stuff in my life, so here goes:

  • My dogs are awesome.  It’s a scientifically proven fact that animals can help ease depression.  I couldn’t name the study but they said so on the Today Show and you know that Dr. Nancy Snyderman does not lie.  That may be neither here nor there, because it might have been some other frequent correspondent who cited that particular study.  But the point is, animals are awesome.  When I am having a bad day, it is a given that at some point or other Sydney will come and bump her head against my arm and force me to love her and Arthur will jump up on the back of the sofa and plop down right behind me with his chin on my shoulders.  It may be somewhat selfish, but it’s nice to know my dogs are always happy to see me.
  • My family is awesome.  It suddenly occurs to me that they should have been first on this cheer-myself-up list, but on the other hand, they’re all animal lovers too, so maybe they’ll understand.  They’re all smart and kinda funny and I like them.
  • Good friends.  If you’re reading this, it probably means you are one of them.
  • Perspective.  My house was not mowed down by a tornado or flooded.  I have never in my life gone hungry.  There have been definite tragedies in my life, but as a family, we’ve survived them all pretty well.  It’s hard to indulge in a wasteful bout of self-pity when Brian Williams is standing in front of a wasteland that used to be someone’s neighborhood.

So okay, I do not have it all that bad.  But still.  Jonah Day.

Brrr…It’s COLD In Here…

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…I was reading Chauceriangirl’s blupdate yesterday, which was titled “Brrr,” and my mind automatically went to Bring It On, starring Kirsten Dunst.  In the movie, Dunst finds out her former cheer captain stole cheer routines from the Clovers, one of which was “Brrr…It’s Cold In Here!  Must be some Clovers in the ATMOSPHERE!!!!!”  This is apropos of nothing except that since yesterday that cheer routine is stuck in my head like a bad ear-worm.  I know the movie is kind of silly, but I like it anyway.  For one, Kirsten Dunst is so freaking cute in that movie, all irresistable joy, not to mention her ethical code with respect to the art of cheerleading.  Plus Eliza Dushku is badass no matter what movie she’s in.  Except for True Lies.  She was truly unlikable in that one, but that has more to do with the stupid character she played than a lack of that utterly fab cool-girl moxy she displays in every other role.  The boy doesn’t do much for me there (sorry, cute boy who plays Eliza’s brother) but then again a movie about cheerleading ethics?  Not exactly the kind of movie Clive Owen-or other dreamy matinee idols I find dreamy-enjoy being in. 

Okay, I’ve talked about Bring It On, so maybe now the earworm will just go away.  In other news, it’s cold in Texas.  Like really, really cold.  Shut up Green Bay and Steelers fans.  Texans aren’t used to driving in ice and snow and it freaks us out, as does cold weather.  And while we’re talking about football, THE SUPERBOWL IS BEING HELD IN ARLINGTON, TX, NOT DALLAS, TX.  Sorry, had to get that out of the way.  Some media dude will be standing in front of cowboy stadium telling everyone how’s he’s in Dallas.  Well, dude, no you actually are in Arlington.  Just FYI.  Also, Fort Worth?  Not the same thing as Dallas.  In fact, they’re two separate cities. 

Wow, I didn’t know that was bugging me so bad.

Any-to-the-hoo, owing to the ice and snow, North Texas has pretty much shut down.  Snow day, ya’ll!!  Except for how I’ve worked all the way through it.  I proctored online exams for students all day yesterday and have spent a vast majority of my time during these “free days” doing job-related tasks.  Luckily, today’s online exams have been postponed, so maybe a little laziness is in order.

So basically this blupdate is about…nothing.  And I don’t even like Jerry Seinfeld. 

That was a 90s joke.  I’m so old…

Checking In…

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December has been a mixed bag.  How is this you may ask?  Well let me explicate.  🙂

BAD: I was deathly ill the first two weeks.  I had the raging fever, chills, nausea, coughing (snot fun!), the whole nine yards.  Wasn’t flu-which THANK YOU, OH GREAT HIGHER POWER, because after relentlessly nagging my nursing students to turn in their flu shots, they would have never let me forget this.  Wasn’t pneumonia.  It was just a nasty mean little bug which required two rounds of antibiotics and some codeine, followed by hydrocodone-based coughing syrup just to get through it.

GOOD: The tech guy at my office taught me how to VPN from home and my boss allowed me to work from home almost the entire two weeks so I didn’t have to take so much sick time.  Most days were half-days and if I disappeared offline for hours at a time to rest, no one raised an eyebrow.  My office-peeps rock!!!!!

BAD: I ran out of money, like December 4th.

GOOD: The professors pitched in and gave every single secretary in the office a cash bonus out of their own pockets.  It’s not a lot, but it’s enough to get me through the month without having to borrow money from my parents or my sister.

BAD: I was sick when my parents bought my birthday lemon pie and I couldn’t even really taste it before it went bad.

GOOD: My former boss (from social work) stopped by my office the other day and gave me a plate of her homemade lemon bars, which DUDE, those babies are awesome.  Graham cracker crust, cream cheese and lemon.  That first bite of mannah did not taste as good.  Just saying.

BAD: I am officially out of room for books.  Like literally-in my closet where the clothes should live, I have stacks and stacks of books.  There is NO MORE ROOM IN THE INN.  Which for a total book-whore like myself is sadness.

GOOD: My sister and my friends pitched in and gave me a Nook for Christmas.  And my work-group of friends who were in on the secret gave me a pretty little cover for my Nook.  What?  You want to see it?  Okay.

Tupper Quote Cover in Leaf by Barnes & Noble: Product Image

So, although, being broke and being sick on my birthday sucked dirty socks, I’m going to say that the good outweighed the bad by like A LOT.

Aside from that, there are all kinds of things going on in the lives of my family and friends that I’m truly invested in.  I have an Arizona friend I need to feel better ASAP.  I have a family member in Utah that I’m sending all my happy-this-will-totally-work vibes out to.  I have a sister who is making huge life changes and is brave and badass.  In short, with all the other stuff all the other people in my life are dealing with, I’m just feeling blessed that I get to be in their lives.