Category Archives: High Cost of Living

The Day Izzy Went Nutty in Wal-Mart


It’s been a while I know, but I have this need to talk about something that happened this weekend at Wal-Mart.  I know a lot of people hate on Wal-Mart.  I am one of them but I admit I still go every now and again when I am broke and need to save some money.  This weekend I was in that state of broke-ness and my sister and I moseyed on over to the second closest Wal-Mart.  The closest Wal-Mart isn’t as nice as the second closest one and usually about twice as crowded.  So we made the drive and everything seemed propitious.  We found a parking spot right up front (shopping karma!) and we found exactly what we needed in under 10 minutes.  We even moseyed around a little bit and window shopped for stuff we had no intention of purchasing.  Then we got in line to pay for our items.  And we waited and waited and waited…you get the idea.  Wal-Mart never has enough lanes open but one goes in there pretty much expecting that.  We really weren’t too upset about it.  We were chatting about this and that and if the line moved glacially (ICEBERG, yo) we were taking it pretty well.  Then lo and behold, a cashier opened the next lane.  When I noticed, I immediately walked over and I got there at just about the exact same time as another patron, we’ll call her Cap’n Crazeballs, who’d moved from the very back of the line.  Cap’n immediately went on the offensive telling me that she was there first (she wasn’t actually, given that I was in front of her) and I…I behaved badly.  I really did.

Let me be honest-I was so angry by her abusive words and hostility that I really, truly only remember two things that were said.  First, she definitely called me a fat bitch, and second, I definitely responded by telling her “you ARE the people of Wal-Mart.”  She got louder and more verbally abusive and I got quieter and more Southern by the moment.  Southern on me equals napalm with a super thin veneer of almost civility.  I very rarely go Southern.  I think most people would be utterly shocked to encounter me when I’m Southern as my reputation is solidly in the “super sweet but could be a little more assertive” category.  My sister was so angry by Cap’n Crazeballs that she left in order to avoid a very large scene.  At that point, I had no intention of giving any ground so I took all of my sister’s items and added them to my own pile.  As the checker rang my items up, Cap’n Crazeballs continued her verbal assault.  It was so utterly ridiculous.  Even as it was happening, I knew it was stupid and I should just let it go because haters gonna hate and all that jazz.  She only had like four items and I could absolutely have let her go in front of me.  In fact, if instead of calling me a fat bitch and generally being a ginormous asshat, had she just politely asked, “hey, I’m kind of in a hurry and only have four items, do you mind?” my answer would have been, “not at all, have at it.”  I absolutely would have let her go in front and been happy to do it.  But she started off with fat bitch and I could. not. let. it. go.

Caught in between was the store clerk who couldn’t have been a day over 19 and looked as though she weighed about 90 pounds.  She was terrified and did not make eye contact with either one of us or respond in any way to either one of us.  I was pretty annoyed at her, too, at the time, for not asking to help the next customer in line instead of what became a free-for-all, but once I calmed down after I got home, I felt really sorry for her.  First, well…I kind of was being a fat bitch.  I mean, let’s face it-I am fat and I was also, at the time, super bitchy.  Second, Cap’n Crazeballs was not exactly a petite teeny-tiny slice of Texas pie herself, if you know what I mean.  And then, our checker works at Wal-Mart where even full-time employees-very hard working, industrious individuals-still frequently need government assistance in order to feed their families.  There’s something wrong with that.  There is no way they pay that checker nearly enough to get in between two angry fat bitches.  I probably wouldn’t have taken a side, either, in her position.  And then there’s the fact that even though we had waited 20 minutes, there were still three parties in line ahead of us who’d been waiting even longer.  Had she asked for the next person in line, it wouldn’t have been me.  If one of them had called me out like the Cap’n I would have deserved it.  So I admit I squirmed a bit on the drive home as I reflected over the scuffle.  I was just as bad as Cap’n Crazeballs because it’s not like I encouraged the people in front of me to go get in line.  And I knew, even as I wasn’t backing down, that we were both in the wrong, and I was slightly worse because at least I knew it.

As I left, Cap’n Crazeballs tried to push the empty cart at my back, but I had a pretty good grip on it, so it didn’t really do any damage.  I muttered something like “charmed to have met you, classy one” and then left the store.  My sister had the car started and waiting out front right around the same time I came to the sudden realization that Cap’n Crazeballs was probably pissed enough to run me down if she got there first and I should probably be glad open carry isn’t permitted in Texas.

I got really, truly rage-filled in a store only one other time about ten years ago on the Day After Thanksgiving Shopping Extravaganza©.  Another abusive fellow customer, although that time I just turned around and left the store rather than engage.  Which store, you ask?  Thank you for asking.  It was Wal-Mart.  I think it’s a sign that Wal-Mart and I are just not meant to be together.


I Need To Be Rich


I had my first ever spa day today.  Well, spa afternoon anyway.  I had a 60 minute massage, followed by a facial, followed by a pedicure.  My toenails are now a nice, wintery shade of purple.  I would like to have the money to do that once a month.  Alas, I do not.  I belong in the tax bracket that does that once in a very blue moon and maybe not even then.  But it could be worse.  I could be in that tax bracket that never gets to do something like that ever.

Still…I could get used to that.  I feel like a cooked spaghetti noodle.  A tasty cooked spaghetti noodle, not one that’s all cold and overcooked.  This analogy is not working, is it?  Bad analogy!!  Bad!

The Official “In With the New Year, Out With Old” Post Part I (wherein Izzybella lists stuff she’s grateful for)


I got this idea from Jehara and I think it’s a really good one.  It’s so easy to dwell on the negative stuff, but I do have quite a lot to be thankful for. So in no particular order, I’m grateful for:

  • My sister and greatest friend, foi (aka chauceriangirl, aka the most witty, warm, brilliant, wonderful person I know)
  • My family-we’re disfunctional, sure, but aren’t all families a little?
  • Being a part of Women of Juarez-at once the most difficult and most rewarding show I’ve ever done
  • Getting to know jehara much better-we were friend-ish from the moment we met but now we’re actual friends and I think that is SO ridiculously cool
  • Getting to know v better-she intimidated the hell out of me when I first met her.  come to think of it, she still kind of does-but, like jehara, she sets a kick-ass example with her art, and that matters to me
  • Getting to know the infamous and much loved l-squared (I was getting a complex over how very much foi loves her too, but after getting to know her better, I totally understand)
  • Having an actual group of girlfriends-I’ve never really had that before
  • The two most adorable yellow dogs anywhere, Baxter and Cydney
  • Being aunt to the cutest little black border collie there has ever been in the whole world
  • Cheap rent (it’s not free, and come to think of it, not necessarily cheap either until you consider that it includes all utilities and meals) while I work on paying down my school loans
  • Books, books, books-especially getting to finish the Harry Potter series.  I was so satisfied at the outcome and really enjoyed being able to experience it in a way future generations won’t be able to
  • Can’t stop the Serenity
  • Buffy sing-along
  • Lone Star Comics
  • The most perfect Christmas celebration ever with my girlfriends
  • Blogs, which made it so much easier to keep in touch with old friends and make new ones
  • My co-worker Evie, otherwise known as my office mom
  • Getting off caffeine altogether (six weeks caffeine-free!!!)
  • Getting off Ambien as a result of getting off caffeine
  • Knowing that if I can do that, then I definitely possess the resolve and will-power to accomplish other goals
  • Am now officially half-way through writing my play, which is way better than where I was a year ago-so it’s taking longer than I thought-at least I’ve been working on it instead of just talking about it
  • Getting to have the last week of the year (and then some) off from work without even having to touch vacation time-just one of the benefits of working in higher education
  • Speaking of that, I’m also grateful to have a job that allows me such flexibility
  • Jane Freaking Espenson answered my dorky-ass fan mail
  • Found a new hairstylist who actually doesn’t mind the fact that I’m not all that chatty-she’s not either

Yep, Jehara was right.  Writing all that actually put in me in a better mood this morning.  Weird.

Ya’ll be good.  Part II coming soon.  I know.  You can hardly wait.  🙂

New Definition for Insanity


Paying $72K for $40K worth of school loans.

I got my Sallie Mae statement this weekend.  If I pay my school loans exactly according to schedule, my last payment will occur sometime in 2032 and $40K will have cost me over $72K.  I read that and then I cried.

So re-evaluating this thing called budget–such an ugly word–and have determined that lots of my extras are going so that I can pay my loans more quickly.  I’ve cancelled Netflix and I won’t be joining any gyms any time soon (sorry, CG, I just can’t afford it).  I’m also thinking about getting rid of my very nice girl-sized SUV and replacing it with a much cheaper used car.  Seriously, I’d like to have my school loans paid off before retirement.  I’m strongly considering taping that letter from Sallie Mae to my wallet to discourage excessive spending.  I won’t say I’m never playing with my friends again, because that’s both depressing and unrealistic.  But I have to cut back and economize.   Another ugly word.

You know, I don’t think the world owes me or anything, but it’d be nice to have someone just hand me things I love and spend too much money on (books, DVDs, music, and the occasional really cute outfit).  Or maybe free lotto tickets-one of them’s bound to be a winner someday.  But I can’t make myself buy lotto tickets.  I just can’t.  So I guess I’ll have to do this the old-fashioned-middle-class way and just work hard.  That’s so depressing.

The Post You’re About to Read


I just paid $1.99/gallon for gasoline. I know it could have been purchased even more cheaply had I the inclination to drive around and look for a better price, but I still feel pretty good about the $1.99. I actually managed to fill up my tank (I have a Ford Escape) for only $26.00!! What completely stinks is that just before gas prices went way up, I had a cute little economical Honda Civic coupe. Hindsight is 20/20. Hindsight is also kind of an annoying know-it-all who spends too much time with that Monday morning quarterback dude. I’m not sure who is a worse influence on who. (Or should that be “whom?” To speak English good is not my strong point.)

I’m in the process of moving. I’d intended to move late December, but the apartment complex I live in has sort of gotten scary. I’m moving in with my parents. Before proceeding further I feel compelled to holler, “I PAY RENT!!!!” I may be a little sensitive, but 30 year olds who live with Mom and Dad tend to be mocked. I’ll be heading back to grad school shortly and I’d already determined I needed to find a roommate. My parents offered themselves.

For some unfathomable reason, my parents insist they absolutely love having me there. This may have something to do with the aforementioned rent I pay as well as my willingness to do just about any chore thrown my direction. I’m one of those people who find it difficult to sit still if someone else is moving around. My stepmother is one of those people who find it difficult to sit still, period. The end result is she gets a lot of help from me. She likes that. Ergo, she likes having me there. Plus I get along with my parents. I’d actually like them a bunch even if we weren’t related. So I feel fine about living with them. Which, naturally, explains the last 2 paragraphs justifying the decision!

Anyway, my sister came over after work yesterday to bully me into help me with packing. I’m a very tidy person, but I’m a born packrat. Every nook and cranny is filled with STUFF. I have too much stuff. So Faithie came over to nag, um I mean bully, no wait, I mean help me by insisting I get rid of things that the little packrat in me wants to hang on to.

We came across an envelope filled with pictures from a trip we took a few years ago to visit our mother and stepfather. A lot of the pictures were of Alicia, our little sister, who died last January. There were also a great many pictures of Alicia’s daughter, our neice. I’m glad Faith was there because I’m afraid I would have gotten maudlin over them. As it was, there were a couple of moments where we both just stopped for a moment to remember. She was a pretty girl. I miss her!

Okay, stuff to get rid of. Gotta go!