Category Archives: dumb politics

Where Izzybella Catches Ya’ll Up

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Yeah, it’s been a while.  I had stuff to do, see, work stuff and other stuff.  This excuse is lame, is it not?  But it’s true.  Truthy.

So, let me break it down into two parts because I feel like doing that way.

Work: This is my busy season (this and December/January).  For some reason the fall start date kicks my butt.  I think it might be that we tend to accept so many more students in the fall, but we also had some new start-up sites, which I realize means nothing to you, but let me assure you it’s a lot of work.  I also travel with the lead teachers and a few administrators to our distance sites to do new student orientation, which I love, mostly because it’s fantastic to meet the students who have been emailing me for so many months.  Right when they first start the program, they’re so excited and happy to be here.  You have to cherish that because in less than a year, they’ll be bitter, unhappy, exhausted seniors who will hate every single one of us up until the day they graduate from the program.  They usually lighten up again by then!  The prospect of no more classes will do that to a student.  My SR2 students started courses today, but the rest of them start next Monday.  Lots to do between now and then.

Friends/Family/Everything else: My friend R got married this last weekend.  This is fabulous because weddings are always terrific, but mostly because she’s marrying a really nice guy.  I think he might actually be the last nice guy, which means I’m dead out of luck, but I couldn’t wish her more joy than I already do.  We did the bachelorette party two weekends ago.  I won nothing from the various contests.  I think I might have had a chance with some nekkid man artwork, had Chauceriangirl not played her hand at the last minute.  Her nekkid man art revealed nothing, yet everything.  It was genius.  She deserved the win, trust me.  Also, I had no idea my sister could be that filthy.

Wedding was last Friday, followed by reception on Sunday.  Here’s a good reception story for you and by good I mean embarrassing for me, personally, hence my goofy-ass need to immediately post it on the internet.  I wore heels to R’s reception.  Back about 100 lbs ago, this wouldn’t be particularly noteworthy, but I stopped wearing heels years ago because of heel spurs and ouchie feet.  As a result I am out of practice and no longer walk very well in heels.  But I promised R I would so I did.  Enter the Electric Slide.  Enter me trying to dance the Electric Slide.  It was badness and I decided to beat a hasty retreat, at which point I fell hard on my ass.  It was awesome.  Also it was caught on video by a co-worker who is now emailing me to tell me she accepts payment in twizzlers and oreos.  She keeps threatening to You Tube it, but I have decided to hold a hard stance on negotiating with You Tube terrorists.  After all, there are already a million You Tube videos depicting fat women falling on their asses as they attempt to dance.  I don’t think mine would add anything special to the genre.  But if she does post it, I’ll be sure and link you.  I’m a masochist that way.

My parents watched the RNC last weekend.  My parents are hard-core, ya’ll.  My stepmother loves, loves, loves Paul Ryan.  She doesn’t love Mitt Romney exactly but since she thinks Obama is the anti-Christ, he already has her vote.  I also witnessed the Clint Eastwood debacle since, you know, every single television in the house was turned on to the RNC.  I still love you, Clint Eastwood, even if you’d have been better off keeping your opinions to yourself.  This is my new philosophy this election season, starting now.  Unless you are one of the select few individuals who will love me no matter who I vote for, I have political views and I’m officially keeping them to myself.  Feel free to discuss with me, but don’t expect an agreement, disagreement or any other response.  The only caveat:  I am all for differing opinions but stop with all the hatin’.  You can think Obama’s policies are detrimental to the national economy without attacking him as a person, husband or father.  You can think Mitt Romney’s policies are antiquated and out-of-touch without throwing down about him being a filthy rich douche-canoe.  I’m willing to listen to anyone’s point-of-view if they have the intelligence and maturity to express it thoughtfully and in an educated manner.  This means that, yes, when my stepmother called Obama “lazy” over the weekend, we might have possibly had a small screaming match.  A teensy one.  Seriously?  Stop the hate, ya’ll!!  It just makes you look stupid.  Also?  People who hate have bad skin and smelly feet.  It’s a proven fact.

Finally, I saw Bourne Legacy this weekend.  Jeremy Renner?  Is awesome and wears the hell out of a suit.  That is all.

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Random Thoughts March 15, 2010 Issue

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  • Daylight Savings Suck sucks.  I hate it.  As my bestie put it, it’s like the government taking away a full hour of sleep for no good reason.  It’s just wrong.  I’m already not a morning person, so when I’m getting up an extra hour earlier, it just makes it worse.  I think the need for daylight savings time has passed–pick a time and stick to it.  K, thx.
  • We just finished another kid’s show at the theatre I work at.  I love working at the theatre-I really do.  Besides the fact that I just love theatre in general, I have a particular fondness for this theatre.  The people are AWESOME.  I love the people I work for and with.  I love our volunteers.  I love our patrons.  And then…there are kid’s shows.  If you’re a regular reader of my blog you know how much I really hate working kid’s shows.  Let me stress again that this has nothing to do with the kids.  The kids are talented and will one day rule the universe and I hope they remember me kindly.  I even like the little kids who hang around the cast door after the show to catch a glimpse of the actors and get autographs.  It’s really cute.  And most of their parents/grandparents are really nice people who are trying, in their own way, to expose their children to art.  I’m never gonna argue with that.  But some parents, and they know who they are, are so freaking obnoxious and entitled.  They think the rules don’t apply to them.  I had a patron on Saturday express sheer and utter disbelief that I seated his friend, who was 15 minutes late, in the last row instead of his actual assigned seat on the second row.  Here’s the deal dude–all those people you would have been disturbing with your late-ass self also paid good money for seats, but unlike you, they were on time.  Letting you go sit in the middle of the second row 15 minutes after the show already started isn’t fair to them and it isn’t fair to the actors.  Live theatre is not the same as movies.  It’s a different (and in my opinion, way funner) beast.  Ordinarily I don’t seat late at all-he’d have had to wait till the second act.  I did him a favor getting him in at all, so the jerkiness was…just…jerky.  Yeah.  Also had a crank who was cranky that I wouldn’t let his under-3 child into the theatre despite the “no children under 3” rule.  He felt that (a) 3 was an arbitrary number that I clearly just pulled out of my ass for fun, and (b), I should make an exception for him because his kid was already there.  Plus there was the person who called and made a reservation for four and then called me a half hour later to cancel it, because she didn’t realize our theatre was in TX.  (She lived in MA)  I kind of think the non-MA area code would have been a clue, but I guess not.  So…show’s over.  And to that I say boo-yah!!
  • It’s Spring Break here.  No students.  No teachers.  Very little work.  My office-mate and I have traded crazy family stories involving everything from brothers faking sickness to get out of doing dishes (I’m looking at you, P) to fart stories.  Ieven re-enacted my brother’s sickness-faking.  He was terrible at it.  I mean, smart?  Yes.  Gifted writer?  Yep.  A talented actor?  No.  I’m sorry, but he was terrible.  And still the day has just freakin’ dragged by.  I have 7 more minutes though.  Not that I’m counting, because I certainly would never do that. 
  • Oh, now it’s 4 minutes…which I noticed ONLY because I just happened to glance at the clock on the lower right hand of my computer monitor. 
  • Three minutes.
  • Two minutes.
  • Yeah, I’m done.  Ya’ll have a good one…