You know what happens when you schedule a last minute flight on a plane that is already almost sold out? You get the hump seat. You sit between two people you have never before in your life met. If you are lucky, at least one of them is kind of like the woman I sat next to on the return flight-she works for a Washington think tank, but assured me over and over that she is not a lobbyist and had no immediate plans to “join the dark side.” I wound up liking her even though she is six feet tall and could probably just as easily have a career as a New York fashion model. If, however, you are unlucky, you will be sitting next to a guy who thinks he is hawt, hawt, hawt, in low-cut skinny jeans that not only show a substantial amount of butt cleavage, but (when standing) also shows that little column of hair that leads to the man parts. He will also stare creepily at you and periodically point out strange things he’s found in the Sky Mall magazine. After he leans over to remove his luggage from underneath the seat in front him and then stretches up to remove his carry-on from the overhead compartment, you will feel strangely violated. Them’s the risks of flying…
Archive for June, 2008
Randomness June 25, 2008 Issue
Without further ado, today’s random thoughts:
1. The difference between comedy and drama. I was pondering this as I drove home from work yesterday, mostly because yesterday was one of those difficult days where I’m struggling a bit just to stay afloat. Life is such a soap opera sometimes and I wondered why it couldn’t be a comedy more often. I think it can be summed up in one word-expectations. In drama, the players are constantly optimistic, hoping for the best possible outcome. Usually, the worst possible outcome is what they wind up with. It makes for sadness and hurt feelings and anguish/despair, etc. No one ever learns from their mistakes and so they’re doomed to continually repeat them. In comedy, the players constantly expect the worst and they never get it. The comedy is derived from the imagined anguish/despair, etc. and the reactions given from the ultimate outcome-i.e. the girl forgives the boy for being a dummy-face instead of kicking him to the curb/the boy gets promoted, not fired/the girl wins the respect of her peers instead of their ridicule/etc., and a valuable lesson is learned by all. Which begs the question, are pessimists actually happier people?
2. Still listening to Twilight on CD on the work commute. It isn’t realistic, is it-this grand, all-consuming, passionate love? Real life will eventually intrude on every relationship. It doesn’t mean the love is any less, it just means that it changes over time, evolves. I think after 100 years of Edward’s perfection, Bella might get a little bored. Or maybe I’m projecting. Maybe after 100 years, it will be even better. I was rather wistful this morning thinking how wonderful it would be if I could meet some terrific guy who would sweep me off my feet and make me believe in true love. Real life seems inadequate sometimes in comparison-I had the sudden thought that I’m glad I’m not one of those readers addicted to romance novels of the Harlequin variety. It would either depress me because I don’t have someone who loves me so passionately or lead me to develop a warped sense of romance. Besides, there are paradigms in those stories I find offensive-the idea that someone needs someone else to “complete” them. Isn’t it better if, when you do find that perfect someone, you already have completeness to offer?
3. This leads into a natural segue-my friend Jehara met someone a while back that she loves. When I met him and observed how they reacted it created some conflicting feelings. The first, and strongest, is that I think this someone is Jehara’s one. He’s the person she’ll grow old with and I don’t know why I know, but I do know. Mostly it stems from the fact that this is the first boyfriend of hers I’ve met that when she’s with him, she’s still her-still the same Jehara I hang out with in bookstores and watch buffy-thons with. She doesn’t repress any part of herself when she’s with him, and in a weird way that gives me hope. Maybe it could happen for me after all some day. The conflicting feeling is a little bit of envy. I’ve talked to her about this, so this is nothing new to her. It’s not envy over him, because, although I like him very much, I don’t lurve him. It’s not even jealousy over her new relationship-it’s just kind of a wistful feeling that I don’t have that right now in my life and I think she is tremendously blessed that she does. Don’t know why I felt the need to share that with you, Internet. Oh well.
4. Two of my friends aren’t very friendish anymore and that makes me sad. I don’t know what to say to either one of them about it and I don’t honestly think anything I could say would help. I adore them both and want them both in my life. Sometimes you have friends in your life that are there for a season, but these aren’t season friends-they’re life friends. They’re friends I expect to have when I’m 80 years old (assuming I live that long!). I keep trying to play peacemaker, but peacemakers aren’t very popular. You usually wind up pissing one or both of them off, and that sucks too.
These were deep random thoughts today, weren’t they? I’m thinking I should add something goofy so I can maintain my rep. Thinking…thinking… Okay, here’s random thought #5:
5. I can’t believe I’m admitting this here and I really hope none of my committee members catch wind of my blog, but part of my duties for this conference is finding a tee-shirt. The committee kept not liking every color I sent them and it was getting really frustrating. They didn’t like the first color because they thought boys wouldn’t like it very much and they kept finding reasons to not like every other color I forwarded them. So finally, I took a tee-shirt sample and talked the son of one of my coworkers into wearing it and letting me photograph him in it. Let me tell you, this is a good looking kid-ridiculously pretty track and field star. Anything would look good on him. I forwarded the picture to everyone on the committee and they unanimously agreed that this was the shirt they’d been looking for. The funny thing? It was the very first shirt they originally turned down. I’m telling you-marketing is everything.
Twilight-The Sacreligious Post
Why sacreligious? Because I profoundly love the Twilight series and yet I’m about to complain about it a little bit. So let me offer my disclaimer-I borrowed Twilight (all three books) from my sister and never gave them back. I don’t plan on ever giving them back, but I have assured her than she can borrow them whenever she wants. In order to alleviate my guilt over loving the books so much, but never buying them, I even purchased all three of them on CD so I could “read” them in the car during the work commute. Should the local bookstore do a midnight release party for Breaking Dawn, I will be there. And L-to-the-power-of-two, foi, and I have already planned on taking December 12th off from work in order to see the first matinee. We’ll also be doing the midnight release. My point here is that I’m a fan. I check the Twilight Lexicon at least once a day. I have even read the blog of the guy who’s reading Twilight (good blog by the way, check it out). So, though I complain, I do still love. Without further ado, here are some things that have annoyed me on my recent reread of the Twilight series.
1. Someone is always “pursing” their lips. Seriously. Every major character purses their lips at least once per chapter. It seems like it anyway, which begs the question-why don’t these people have a better range of facial expressions? We’re told Bella’s face is an open book, and many other characters are described as expressive. For the love of Edward, they really need to do something besides purse their lips!
2. Why is Bella totally okay with the fact that Edward was so stalkery? I mean, honestly, ladies. If you found out some dude-even a 100+ year old hot vampire with a strong moral streak-had been hanging around your bedroom while you slept without your knowledge and/or permission, wouldn’t you be a little weirded out? I would. I mean, at the very least, Bella could have worked up some righteous indignation before melting like a big pile of slobbery goo. Have some self-respect, B! Get a little mad first, then melt into goo.
3. Since I’m on the subject of Edward, I know he can’t help his mind-reading ability, but it’s sort of another stalkerish aspect of his character. I’m glad Bella has the particular ability of self-containment and privacy because that levels the playing field in their relationship a bit. For the record, should any hot mind-reading vampires with a strong moral streak show any interest in me whatsoever, the deal’s off* if he can read my mind. A girl needs a little privacy, you know what I’m saying? *by “off” I mean, I reserve the right to reconsider should such an event ever occur.
4. Am I the only one annoyed by how Bella always describes someone’s smile? “He smiled his crooked smile” or “he smiled a [insert descriptive word here] smile.” It’s always that. I accept that’s just the way Bella speaks. Certainly after reading The Host, it’s clear to me that Stephenie Meyer is gifted in the way she allows her characters to speak through her, but that particular turn of phrase is almost as grating to me as the constancy with which characters tend to purse their lips. Adverb, Bella. Look it up.
5. Since I picked on Edward and his vaguely stalkerish tendencies, I should share some of that love with Jacob. Dude, when a girl says no, what she means is no. Gentlemen, please. Generally speaking, though I’ll allow there are always some crazies out there, the vast majority of women aren’t kidding when the word “no” escapes their lips. Jacob is guilty of assaulting Bella in a couple of instances and if I were Bella, I would have totally gone for that crowbar. (Okay, not really-I’m a strictly non-violent sort of person, but still…) Also, that half-ass apology he gave was lame. Bella, honey, I know you feel badly after discovering that you did, in fact, love Jacob, even though you still love Edward more. But Jacob sort of brought it on himself, by confusing the word “no” with the word “yes” even though the word “yes” has an extra letter and sounds completely different from the word “no.”
6. Bella, you have an embarrassment of riches. Stop whining. Your life is not that bad. Except for the parts where crimson-eyed vampires hunt you down for the express purpose of drinking your blood and then killing you dead. That part kind of sucks.
So six little complaints. That wasn’t so bad, right? I’m not the anti-Twilighter. I’m a good fan, I am!!! See, I even wrote some of my complaints directly to Bella, even though she is technically a fictional character. And really, we criticize the ones we love. Right? What? Okay. Excuse me now, I have repenting to do.
Seven Random Thoughts
1. York peppermint patties and orange juice are two great tastes that taste really crappy together.
2. When your wife and your sister-in-law (AKA, me) work really, really, really, really hard on cleaning and organizing your formerly lame kitchen into a wondrous (okay, not quite wondrous until it gets a new floor and a coat of paint) thing of beauty, the proper response is, “I have the best wife and sister-in-law ever! You guys rock-the kitchen and dining room looks awesome.” The incorrect response would be, “I thought we throwing that table out…where are the curtains…how much did you throw away…etc,” and generally freaking out because it wasn’t done exactly according to your personal taste. Guess which response we got?
3. It is a sad, sad thing when the most relaxing time you are able to enjoy while on “vacation” is the half day you are at work.
4. I got a postcard from my friend V, of the Urquhart Castle at Loch Ness. It is neat.
5. Virgina is for Lovers. At least, according to the magnet my friend M gave me. She lives in Virginia. Is she a lover? I can’t say. Good friends keep secrets.
6. James McAvoy is obscenely pretty. (See Atonement, Becoming Jane, the upcoming film Wanted, etc.)
7. In Texas, during the months of June, July, and August, a “cold front” means that instead of being 100 plus degrees, it’s only 90 plus degrees. I think that’s lame. Sometimes I would like to live in a place where the concept of a summer sweater is not a joke. On the other hand, I love Texas winter. It all balances out.
This concludes today’s randomness.
Mommy’s Here! Mommy’s Here!!
I’m told by certain people that I don’t blupdate enough, so I thought I would write a quick post and let everyone know that my mommy is here!! I’m not at all happy about that as you can clearly see. Nope, not happy to see her at all. I did not hug her the moment I saw her, nor have I once thought to myself, “gee, I wish my mom was closer so I could see her more often…” Nope, not at all happy. 
But I’ll bear with the visit,as it is my sacred duty as daughter.
The above is all a bunch of lies except for the part about my mommy being in town…that part, happily, is very, very true.
Be good, all.
June Already? (Randomness June 3, 2008 Edition)
Feels like this year is flying by. Really, I know New Year’s Day was just last month, wasn’t it? Guess not.
Re: my last post. I’m working on it. I shouldn’t blog when I’m feeling all out of sorts and emotional-I know there’s nothing wrong with writing about how I feel, but it’s sort of like I just freaked out all over the Internet, and honestly, what did the Internet ever do to me? I’m sorry, Internet. Forgive me.
So aside from lots of manual labor, I had a pretty good weekend. Thursday I went with L2 to test drive a car. The test drive turned into car-buying and we were there for a looong time. But it was fun. We got to talk and joke a lot in between waiting for the trade-in value, waiting for the offer, waiting for the finance dude (who was freaking hilarious), and waiting for the car delivery. It’s a really cute car. It’s blue. And speedy. I like it. I think we should go out again and L2 should drive. I plan on getting even when my new focus comes in. I’m going to drag L2 to the new car workshop-they feed you and give away prizes like a year of free oil changes, while they explain how important it is to (a) keep your car well-maintained, and (b) use their service department instead of going to your local mechanic. So basically it’s a sales pitch for their service department. But hey, free dinner, and if I’m lucky, a year’s worth of free oil changes…
Friday night I saw the new Indiana Jones movie. I’m going to make a comment here, but I’m going to spoil the hell out of it, so I’ll give some nice spoiler space for those who have not yet seen the movie and want to remain spoiler-free:
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Okay, WTF???!!! There’s this scene early in the movie where they’re in Roswell, NM, and I’m all “no way are they going there” and for a bit it seemed like my fears were unfounded. They even did a quick shot of lost ark, really quick-like, and I thought maybe this is just where they store all the crazy stuff that makes no sense. So then, vampy Blanchett does this autopsy and it looks just like all those alien drawings you see in other movies and books. And I’m all, “seriously, no way they are going there,” and then you see the stupid crystal skull, and I’m still naive and all “nope, they’d never do that.” And then we go into the big round room where the headless crystal dude is sitting with the other crystal skeletons and I realize they all look alien-ey and the room is round and it freaking starts spinning and I’m all “BASTARDS went there!!!” It ruined the movie for me. When I think Indiana Jones, I think cute dude with a whip, awesome fist fights, chases, some snakes or some type of bug/rodent/etc, and a spunky heroine who is both annoyed by, and strangely attracted to, Indy. I don’t think SPACE ALIENS. I’m just saying. It gets two stars-one for Shia LeBouf, who is lovely and every good thing, and one for Karen Allen who was terrific. And, okay, Harrison Ford still has it, whatever “it” is. But seriously, George Lucas. For reals, Steven Speilberg. Aliens?????
Saturday, I was mover-gal. We’ve been getting the house painted (interior and exterior) so all of our belongings were piled into the middle of each room. I spent most of the day moving things back to their proper place. I was supposed to go to a birthday party for a co-worker, but I ran out of afternoon before I ran out of work to do. Saturday night, I went to see a play, Proof, with S at ICT. It was really good. I’ve seen it before-an equity production at Casa, but I wasn’t crazy about that version. This production was a lot better. The set was fantastic, suggesting not just autumn and cold, but a general sense of neglect. The acting was really good-I thought the girl who played Catherine was awesome. She was so engaged in the role and so interesting to watch. I’ve seen Catherine played so angry before that the actor lost the quirky charm inherent in the character. I thought this actor had it spot on. And she did this interesting thing that I noticed so peripherally, that it didn’t solidify as thought till the next day-she kept playing with the key she wore on a chain around her neck, but she played with it every time she seemed to be doubting her own connection to reality. It was like the key was the proof that she was sane and functioning. Once she gave the key to Hal and was seemingly betrayed, she lost that tenuous thread. The other standout was the man who played her father. He was brilliant, shifting at once from thrilled enthusiasm over his proof to helpless dispair at the knowledge that his “machinery” wasn’t working properly. The scene where he holds on to Catherine and begs her not to go was so moving. It was a great show. If you’re in N. Texas you should definitely check it out.
Sunday was the usual routine followed by more manual labor. Since the house was all in flux anyway, the monster decided she wanted to rearrange the living room, so I spent the better part of three hours moving furniture from corner of the room to another, only to watch her eyebrows furrow and “nooooooooo…” I wanted to beat her with a stick, except for the fact that I’m a strictly non-violent type of person. She finally, temporarily, settled on a configuration, but I’d be willing to bet $20 that she has me moving furniture again this weekend.
So that was my weekend. Except for my aching arms and back (and I need to lift weights, because I am weak) it was a pretty good weekend.
